Monthly Archives: April 2014

Parallel Relationship Stages

Opportunities.  They are out there and not always given to you.  A relationship is not something handed to us while sitting around with our hopes and dreams, we all have to get out there in the right environment and jump into the deep end.

Recently I left my job for a new one because I wanted a change of pace and set on a path I could respect.  That and I am really, really over customer service. I thought through how the beginning and ending have us in similar boats.  Lettuce examine…

The Hunt/ Rejection:
You have fantasies about getting into the game and changing your status.  Maybe you can afford to pick and choose from offers and life is all unicorns and lollipops.  The rest will roam hungry, almost desperate for someone to notice you and give you a chance.  So now you wait.  And wait.  And wait.  It’s cold out there.

First Date/ Interview:
They called and want to see you!  Time to share the news to your friends and family.  The night before you analyze what to say and deal with nerves.  The day arrives and you dress to impress.  You wonder what happened to the previous person and if this will lead to something real and you do your best to accentuate your positives instead of displaying any flaws.

Hired/ Official:
You enter into a commitment, which is a risk on both sides.  You consistently show up motivated and eager to please the other.  It’s getting comfortable as you get into the swing of things.  People always ask about the one you’re involved with and you tend to talk about them often.

Complacence/ Stalemate:
No relationship is perfect.  There will be times when you wonder who is giving more and if this the right one.  There may be signs this is toxic or a waste of time with no signs of improvement.  After a while you wonder if there’s another out there for you but you already invested good years with this one. You wonder if you can do without them but you have started on the road to bitterness with your current situation.  You used to look forward to seeing them but now it’s just became a routine.   You don’t know when things started to decline but you take it for granted now.

Breakup/ Leaving:
One day things clear up for you.  It’s not them, it’s you, or whatever nonsense.  You were faithfully with them almost every day.  They were a constant in your life and you were together through thick and thin.  The fear of staying is worse than the fear of leaving and your choice will cost you either way. You end things with them politely.  It’s finally over and you are free with no idea what’s next.  Cutting ties is bitter and sweet but you can shape your lift as you see fit.

-or-

Happy Ever After
You end up spending the rest of your life with your significant other.  Such everlasting dedication defines you and other relationships automatically take a back seat to this one without question.  Hopefully both parties respect each other and improve over the years of learning. Through all the rosy days, mediocre patches, and rough storms, you endure until the end.

Side Note – Standards
I am exceedingly familiar with having healthy requirements when it came to a romantic prospect, but didn’t think about personal preferences when it came to work. I thought I’d be fine with whatever I can get.  My skills are limited but I recently I found out I have so many demands.  I don’t want to pay my dues anymore.  I want a stable full time job without coming in on weekends.  I want paid holidays and vacation with medical coverage.  I should aim for a higher salary each time.  All this within a 20 mile commute.  And on top of that I want to wear casual clothes.  Not to mention admirable peers I can grow.  What I bring to the table is dedication, productivity, compliance, integrity, excellent attendance, and a complete disregard for my cell phone.

It’s not easy dealing with adulthood where doors open and close in complicated ways, but we can all agree that we look forward to something better when we begin or end our chapters.

loyl24


Philosophy of Karaoke

If you want to be completely honest, sing
– Dan in Real Life

It seems there’s a rift between those who like going karaoke and the decliners.  I’m sure most everyone sings, but they choose to miss out on this experience. I go with my friends several times a year, it’s one of my favorite pastimes. We rush into our regular place when the doors open and can make a day of it, on average 6 hours.  I love learning about people through their musical tastes. We all bond over classic hits from yesteryear and it’s touching to unexpectedly see that someone else knows an obscure tune too.

There are many factors to consider when choosing a karaoke site. The Asian type where you reserve and pay for a private room will charge by the hour or per person and you have to look for specials. The song selection should be updated regularly of course. You want to find a place that isn’t dirty and the microphone should be in good order. Lastly the system should be easy to work with as far as searching for artists or alphabetized by song name, then it should be easy to look up the queue and delete or shuffle as necessary. All very advanced stuff, I hope an app comes into play soon.

My friends just see it as a way to let loose but it brings out the competitive edge in me.  Being self conscious to the nth degree I don’t see it as playing around. The worst thing to do is to try a song for the first time all the way through (butchering/ murder). I hate hearing others’ surprise over the lyrics.  We all paid to be here, it’s a test on our performance and time matters.  Before the big day, I choose tunes that fit and flatter my voice, then make it my own until it’s time to show off (killer/ rockstar). I take it seriously like a professional even though unaccomplished as a singer; my voice is weak and to my embarrassment I falter quite often. It’s not necessarily that the machine scores me but I have to hit all the notes and keys or it’s disaster. Mistakes can’t be made, I’ve got to win!

Don’t Rules
Foreign songs – isolates people
Talking – unappreciated
Selecting unfamiliar songs  – nail it or don’t try
Alcohol or smoking – pass
Raunchy or profane language/ dirty videos – keep it to a minimum, think of the children!

Personal picks
Friday – Rebecca Black
Sunday Morning – Maroon 5
Lego House – Ed Sheeran
Apologize – Onerepublic
Ho Hey – Lumineers
Tonight Tonight – Hot Chelle Rae

Amusing crowd pleasers
Waltzing Matilda – Slim Dusty
The Fox – Ylvis
Air Force Ones – Nelly
My Way – Limp Bizkit
In the End – Linkin Park
Gangnam Style – Psy

Blacklisted
Robin Thicke – he knows what he did
Miley Cyrus – post 2010; see above
Christina Perri – zzzzzzzz
Lady Gaga – songs are fun and catchy but her videos, aiya

I find this activity therapeutic despite my control issues and confess I am addicted to it. If only there was a membership that would justify my incentive as a frequent guest.  It’s pretty much my home away from home.

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